lovey love love

Im so in love with my husband. and nothing makes me more happy than knowing that he is in love with me. 


‎"Distance never separates two hearts that really care, for our memories span the miles and in seconds we are there. But whenever I start feeling sad because I miss you I remind myself how lucky I am to have someone so special to miss."
--Unknown


This morning I woke up from a terrible dream where gary busey was sodomizing and kidnapping in my moms neighborhood and we kept running and hiding but he was fast and jumping to get us and we called the cops but the cops werent coming fast enough. thank you husband for texting my phone right then because I woke up and was glad to talk to him even if it was 5:45am. We had a wonderful conversation of our love for eachother, etc. sorry I get to sappy, its my blog! 
I dont know why I havent been having very restful sleep lately and not very deep either. I wake up super early in the morning and I toss and turn, cant ever get comfortable I guess. and I swear, its not like "oh i miss him so much" nothing like that. I feel totally fine! I sleep fine without him, because I tend to hog the bed :P Finally got up, got ready for volunteering and took Gav to the CDC again. I shouldnt have waved bye to him because he started crying again, poor guy.
So being at the office was nice, I felt a tiny bit more comfortable. Of course it wasnt all that busy! I got to know the girls a little more and helped re-organize a few things. Then a different girl walked in like she owned the place. I thought she was nice at first and then as time went on, she really started to rub me the wrong way. Always getting in the way, talking down like I dont know anything (which i know im still training, but let me try to do it first before just doing it for me!) just... i dont know. it really bothered me. I dont think shes there a whole lot and maybe I can try to avoid being scheduled at the same time. I just dont feel like she has the same lovely attitude as the other girls in the office. Everyone else is so great and compassionate and easy to get along with. We are volunteers for goodness sakes! Anyways, I left, picked up Gavin, then headed home for some lunch and his nap. Found out my POA isnt good enough for a loan we are trying to finish, so I had to give Matt that news and I was bracing for impact, so to speak, because the old matt would have FLOWN off the handle at any sort of stressor like that. but i was pleasantly surprised that he was calm and totally amazing about it all! I can hardly believe it. Quite honestly I was so used to the anger and outbursts, that now its like, a dream! His reactions are so much more controlled and thoughtful even! Thank you honey. I know it takes a lot to keep in check when under stress.
I also had to call and double-check I had a counseling appointment this evening. my standing appointment. Turns out I had been taken out of that slot for good. They misunderstood a message I left weeks ago about not being able to show up for an appointment since Matt was deploying. So, needless to say, I felt a little miffed. this isnt the first time ive had issues with scheduling with this office. I made an appointment for next week, as I would like to go and just check in and talk about some stuff. Then just make appointments as needed through this deployment. I really feel as if we have "graduated" from intense therapy. Matt promises that we will go to a session or two right when he gets home so we can stay on the same page and make sure we're good and reintegrated. again, im amazed at how lucky I am to have him. 
Those hiccups, and the fact that a bunch of my mom friends had such a terrific day at the pool and didnt invite us- dont keep me from enjoying the other blessings in my life. Booked our plane ticket to new york. got a fantastic deal and a "first class" upgrade! I am so stoked. Ill be flying alone with Gavin on a long flight so I feel I deserve it. and we spent LESS money than the other fare I was looking at. 
Zumba was so amazing tonight. It felt good to sweat out the bad energy and just let loose for a bit. The new teacher and Melissa tag teamed tonight so we got a little of both and I was thrilled. Im finally learning the combinations to the point where I can perfect the movements, look ahead (and not at the floor) and pretend im dancing on stage like I used to. I loved performing with dance. Its in my soul to dance and perform. 
Tonight we ate spaghetti, should have hosed Gav off afterwards but cleaned the kitchen anyways and we took a bath together! I dyed my hair last night and Im getting it cut tomorrow, im very excited for that. Now Gavin is asleep in his bed and I will enjoy a few shows from DVR before I can get comfy in my bed. Life is Good. <3